A Moment of Fun

I am sitting here at the computer, minding my own business when I end up on some sort of rabbit trail. Do you ever do that? I checked my email and logged out when I became distracted by Yahoo News.  Then I had to look through all of the news stories.  There was one about a mean looking cat which led me to a cat that attacks a greeting card that makes cat type noises.  Something struck me as super funny about that video and I laughed like a lunatic.  I have no idea what makes something funny to me, I just know when I see it.  What weird thing is funny to you?

What Happens Next? Part 3

In my last blog, I asked how I could move forward with a new societal and personal definition, but I am not sure that this is something that can be accomplished.  It seems to be something that will have to be worked toward and earned brick by painful brick.  In the meantime, I have to learn how not to lose hope when searching for an extremely elusive job (and no, I am not being picky at this point).  So, being the obsessive researcher I am, I set myself to find ways to keep a positive outlook.  This is what I came up with for a list.

1. Do something I enjoy each day.  For instance, I really enjoy sitting outside and watching my chickens go about their daily life.  I love watching their personalities and quirks up close.  It really relaxes me to spend even a few minutes in the yard.

2. "Help Guide" has several suggestions:
       -Turn to family and friends for support (I am sure they want to hear me whining every day-- I don't even want to hear my own thoughts.)
       -Start a job club (so you can all whine together)
       -Take care of your body; make sure you exercise, get enough sleep, and eat right.  (personally, I think my body would die if I tried this tactic.  It would know for sure that something terrible was wrong.  Also, my husband would think I was cheating on him.)
      -Create a job search plan (I wonder if this includes my strategy of throwing a resume at any job I think that I can stand for more than a minute?)
     -Volunteer (I am doing this but it also helps my resume because I am volunteering to help other businesses)
3. Stay up with current trends.  Keep researching, keep revising, find new ways to help your job search.  One way that "Campus to Career" suggests is to use the new smartphone apps. 

I could go on and on forever, there is a ton of great information on the web about how to avoid becoming suicidal over your job search. The funny thing is how often these websites mention to not rely on props like drinking or drugs.  No one mentions cheesecake though, I wonder if that is considered a drug?

For me though, I think I will stick to sitting with my chickens a few minutes a day and "working the system."  I just don't see "finding myself" by training for the Iron Man.

What Happens Next? Part 2

Life is a never ending series of endings and beginnings.  My youngest daughter graduated from high school in June and I didn't take a teaching  contract, figuring that I would begin to make a real career for myself in the business world.  However, it hasn't exactly worked the way I planned. Our area has a high rate of unemployment and let's face it, I have a strange resume because of all the different part time jobs I have held over the years to make ends meet, not to further a career goal. 

Suddenly, my self definition (see the first post in this series) caused me to stumble a bit.  I wasn't really a mom any more, my kids were grown and one has moved away, my role had become more like that of a coach.  I loved being a mom, I can honestly say that I spent every day trying to be better than I was the day before.  I was successful in some ways and a blazing failure in some as well.  However, my children and my husband were, and still are in new ways, my passion and my purpose.  I began to ask myself who I was and I didn't have an answer. 

I sent out resume after resume and really expected to get a job fairly quickly, after all I am one of those who never settles for second best and who always gets the jobs I have applied to get.  One resume turned into 10 and 10 turned into 30 fairly quickly.  Now, 30 resumes seems laughable because I am so far past that milestone.  All of this is taking a huge toll on my self definition; I am not even thinking about how society defines me or I would crumble completely.  After all, I am just another nameless, faceless, unimportant, unemployed worker which means that I have no real worth at all in this society. 

The question becomes, "how can I handle this adversity and move forward, even without a meaningful societal or personal definition?"

What Happens Next? Part 1

I have always been aware of the importance of how we define ourselves.  Everything and everyone in this culture gives labels and/or defines the people and things around them as a means of interaction within our cultural framework.  This is not necessarily a bad or good thing to do, it depends heavily on the context.  For instance, here are some examples of bad ways to define others:

1. Using race or gender to define who someone is or how they will behave.
   -i.e.
1.  The way the Nazis defined Jews during WW2 or how Americans defined Japanese citizens during the same time period. 
2. How black Americans were defined until recently.
3. How women were defined and continue to be confined by society and self.

Why on Earth do I bring this up?  When I was a young mother, I stayed at home with my children and over and over again was treated with disrespect from people because of it.  For instance, many times I was asked what I did for a living and I would say that I was a stay at home mom and receive an "oh, so you don't work?" response.  Anyone who ever took care of children knows that it isn't all bon bons and soap operas.  Later, as a home-school mom the responses were even more hostile.  When my children began attending school and I started to work at their school part time just to cover their tuition, I began to understand what it was to have a societal definition that engendered respect.  I could tell people I was a teacher and they would suddenly treat me with respect.  During this time, I earned both my B.S. and M.A. degrees and was able to pride myself in even more societally accepted ways.  In my own eyes and the eyes of those of society I was successful in some manner.

Freedom Of Vs. Freedom From

A young friend of mine on Facebook announced to people the other day that he is tired of politics and doesn't want to hear about them from anyone anymore.  I can appreciate this sentiment; in a political season, I often get tired of hearing and seeing people parroting what they hear the media say about their candidate, or against the candidate they don't support, without checking the facts.  I don't mind politics though, I just want the facts to be represented properly.  However, this particular friend's solution is to have us post whatever we want but to change our setting on the post to make sure that he doesn't have to see it. 

At first I was amused, but I quickly realized that his point of view is the prevailing point of view in this country today.  Our Constitution was written to allow freedom of speech, it doesn't limit speech to that which the majority finds inoffensive.  This is where we come to the crux of the matter, is it freedom of speech or freedom from speech?  In a country where speech is truly free, all of us will be offended occasionally and we just have to pull up our big girl or big boy pants and deal with it.  But do we have a right to cause others to limit their speech in order to prevent others from being offended?  It is okay to voluntarily do this occasionally, but it is not something that should ever be forced upon you.  Unfortunately though, too many young people experienced a Barney-esque mentality and were taught that other people should never be offended, at least in certain societally protected groups.  Essentially they have been taught over and over again that freedom from speech is more important than freedom of speech.  But if the cornerstone of a building is demolished, can the building stand?

It seems like such a small thing, someone basically saying "censor yourself when you talk with me."  But is it?  Men and women have fought and died for the rights of all of us to speak freely and to be offended occasionally.  It is the blessing and the curse of a free society.  As for me, I would rather be offended occasionally, than to limit such a precious freedom.  That which we give away is gone, it is no longer ours to keep and protect. 

Job Hunting Part 2, 3, 4 -- Who Knows?...

I emailed a resume and cover letter in to a company that was advertising an open position and about an hour later I received a call.  It was the most brilliant hiring strategy I have ever experienced.  The company owner said that he just wanted to talk with me a few minutes and get an idea of who I am etc.  If you really want to know what a potential candidate is like, call them and ask a few questions.  Think about it.  When you go to an interview you dress up, do your research and prepare for whatever questions you think may come but if you get a call out of the blue, they get a much better assessment. 

The reason I mention this is because he asked me what it is I want to do.  The truth is that I don't know.  I am happy being busy so I know that I could be happy pretty much anywhere and I really have to get a job very, very soon.  But I don't know what my dreams are anymore.  That is what I am trying to find out.  My kids are raised and I have gotten an education because I love learning (in a later post I might write about why you can be over-educated) but what do I want to do?  I don't know and I don't think I can know until I am working again.  Gee whiz people, I am a great catch, just look past the keywords and talk with me!  Maybe my dream job can be helping your business to be successful.

Little Squirrel

I have written about my little squirrel friend in a previous blog.  She is a fun little yard friend.  However, yesterday the neighbor boy mixed rat poison with peanut butter and left it out near my bird feeder but on his side of the fence.  I couldn't keep her from eating it, I was powerless to help at all.  Soon enough it was gone.  You can't explain to a squirrel that it is a trap.

This morning I went out to the feeder and called out.  No squirrel came.  I wish I understood why people feel like you have to kill something just because it happens to like darting around your trees.  I am so very sad, I know it was just a little squirrel, but it was my little squirrel.